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    7/24/2008

    7月24日罗兰巴特说

         我一生中遇到过成千上万个身体,并对其中的数百个产生欲望;但我真正爱上的只有一个。这一个向我点明了我自身欲望的特殊性。
    这一选择,严格到只能保留唯一(非他/她不可)。
     
          要在成千上万个形象中发现我所喜欢的形象,就必须具备许多偶然因素,许多令人惊叹的巧合。这真是一个奇特的谜,我百思不得其解:为什么我爱慕这一个?为什么我苦苦地思念他/她?我苛求的是整体(倩影,形态,神态)?或仅仅是某一局部?倘若是后一种,那么在我所爱的情偶身上,又是什么东西最令人心醉?是什么不起眼的小东西(也许小到难以相信),或是什么微不足道的小事?是断了一片指甲,崩了一颗牙,还是掉了一缕头发?再不就是抽烟或闲聊时手指叉开的动作?对这种种细微末节,我憋不住想说:这多可爱!
     
          可爱的意思就是:这是我喜爱的,也就是唯一的。然而我愈是感觉到自身欲望的特殊性,我愈没法表达清楚;目标的精确与名称的
    飘忽相对应;欲望的特殊只能引起表述的模糊。语言上的这一失败只留下了一个痕迹:“可爱”。
     
         “可爱”是精疲力尽之后留下的无可奈何的痕迹,一种语言的疲乏。我斟字酌句,搜索枯肠,也无法恰如其分地形容我所爱的
    形象,无法确切表达我的爱欲,到头来,我不得不甘认——并使用——用义反复:这可爱的东西真可爱,或者,我爱你,因为你
    可爱,我爱你因为我爱你。
     
          迷恋的情愫构成了情话,但箍死了情话。要形容迷恋,总不外乎这样的表述:“我给迷住了”。到了语言的尽头不得不重复最后
    一个词——就像唱片放完之后老是重复同一个音一样——的时候,这种语言上的肯定让我陶醉:雄辩宏论的精彩煞尾,市井秽语的低俗,以及振聋发聩的尼采式的“是”等种种价值观在此汇聚共存,而同义反复不正式县城了这一奇特的状态吗?

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    小西wrote:
    o(∩_∩)o...
    Aug. 17
    maggie 林wrote:
    恭喜!!!
    July 24

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